It would seem, in chapter 11,
that the sisters at Corinth gave the assembly a good deal of trouble, and that
they had forgotten entirely their due relative place. No doubt the men were at
least as much to blame. It is hardly possible that women should ever put
themselves forward in the church unless Christian men have deserted their true
responsible position and public action. It is the man’s place to guide; and
although women may assuredly be far more useful in certain cases, still, unless
the man guides, what an evident departure from the order God has assigned to
them both!

 

Thus it was at Corinth. Among
the heathen, women played a most important part, and in no quarter of the
world, perhaps, so prominent a one as there. Need it be said that this was to
their deep shame? There was no city in which they were so degraded as that in
which they attained such conspicuous and unnatural prominence. And how does the
apostle meet this? He brings in Christ. This is what decides all. He affirms
the everlasting principles of God, and he adds that which has so brightly been
revealed in and by Christ. He points out that Christ is the image and the glory
of God, and that the man stands in an analogous place as connected with and
distinguished from the woman. That is to say, the woman’s place is one of
unobtrusiveness; in fact, she is most effective where she is least seen. The
man, on the contrary, has a public part—a rougher and ruder task, no doubt—one
that may not at all bring into play the finer affections, but which demands a
calmer and more comprehensive judgment. The man has the duty of the outward
rule and administration.

 

Accordingly, the apostle marks
the first departure from what was right by the woman’s losing the sign of her
subjection. She was to have a covering on her head; she was to have that which
indicated as a sign that she was subject to another.* The man seemed to have
failed just in the opposite way; and although this may seem a very little
thing, what a wonderful thing it is, and what power it shows, to be able to
combine in the same epistle eternal things and the very smallest matter of
personal decorum, the wearing of long hair or short, the use of a covering on
the head or not! How truly it marks God and His Word!

 

(*Ed. note:There is no warrant
whatever for the notion, so prevalent today, that the woman’s hair is the
covering spoken of in 1 Cor. 11:5, 6. "For if a woman be not covered, let
her hair also be cut off. But if it be shameful to a woman to have her hair cut
off or to be shaved, let her be covered" (v. 6 JND). The covering and the
hair are clearly distinct in this verse. May we also consider whether the
tendency today toward getting away with as small a head covering as possible is
glorifying to God and whether it befits the truth—that of the woman being
hidden and subject—depicted in this symbol.)

 

It was out of order for woman to
prophesy with her head uncovered; man’s place was to do so. He is the
"image and glory of God" (v. 7). The apostle connects it all with
first principles, going back to the creation of Adam and Eve in a very blessed
manner, and above all bringing in the second Man, the last Adam.

 

The first part of 1 Cor. 11 has
nothing to do with the assembly, and thus does not dispose of the question
whether a woman should prophesy there. In fact, nothing is said or implied in
the early verses of the assembly at all. The point primarily argued is of her
prophesying after the manner of a man, and this is done with the greatest
possible wisdom. Her prophesying is not absolutely shut out. If a woman has a
gift for prophesy, which she certainly may have as well as a man, for what is
it given of the Lord but for exercise? Only she must take care how she does
exercise it. First of all, he rebukes the unseemly way in which it was done—the
woman forgetting that she was a woman, and the man that he is responsible not
to act as a woman. They seem to have reasoned in a petty way at Corinth that because a woman has a gift no less than a man, she is free to use the gift
just as a man might. This is in principle wrong; for after all, a woman is not
a man, nor like one officially, say what you please. The apostle sets aside the
whole basis of the argument as false; and we must never hear reasoning which
overthrows what God has ordained. Nature ought to have taught them better. But
he does not dwell on this; it was a withering rebuke even to hint at their forgetfulness
of natural propriety.

 

(From Lectures
Introductory to the Study of the Epistles of Paul the Apostle.)

There is a beautiful little
picture in the Old Testament in connection with the candlestick. The candle was
really a little olive-oil lamp with a wick. The wick would burn just so long,
and then turn over charred and blackened, needing to be snuffed. The Lord told
Moses to make a golden candlestick with seven lamps, and its snuffers and the
snuff-dishes of pure gold. The more I read my Bible the more I am impressed
with the importance of every word. What is there in snuffers and snuff-dishes?
Well, you see, if a lamp is going to shine brightly, it needs to be snuffed
sometimes; and if I want to burn brightly for Christ, there will be many a time
when I have to judge myself in the presence of God, or I will be just like the
burned wick which obscured the light. The priest of old was to go in and trim
the lamp and use a golden snuffer. Gold in Scripture speaks of that which is
divine, so the believer who reproves his brother is to go to him in fellowship
with God. I may be able to help my brother if I go in tenderness and grace.
What did the priest do with that snuff when he took it away? Did he scatter it
all around, get it on his white robe, and on his hands, and go around defiling
the garments of other priests? Oh, no; he was to take that dirty black snuff
and put it in a golden snuff-dish, and cover it up so that it would not defile
anybody else. That is what love does. You do not spread abroad your brother’s
failures, you just show real love, and cover them up in the presence of God.
That is love in a practical sense. "Love covers a multitude of sins"
(1 Peter 4:8 JND).

 

 

FRAGMENT. Love enables a man to
meet all trials. Should one spit in his face, this makes no difference, for
love abides because it never draws its strength from circumstances, but rides
above all circumstances.     J.N. Darby

 

 

FRAGMENT. Love is active; love
leads one to seek to serve, to delight to minister. Are you trying to serve the
people of God or are you one of those who love to be served? Some Christians
are always wanting others to do for them, and then there are Christians who are
always trying to do for others. You know which are the happier of the two. The
folk that are constantly looking for attention are never happy. They are ever
feeling hurt and slighted. But with those who are manifesting the love of
Christ how different! Someone once said to me, "I go to such and such a
place, but they are a cold lot there. I never see any love manifested,"
and I said, "Do you ever show any?" He looked at me and said,
"Well, perhaps not as much as I should." Standing right near was
another who had been to the same place, and I said, "How do you find them
down there?—a pretty cold lot?" "Why," she said, "I think
they are one of the most loving and affectionate groups of Christians I have
ever seen." She was showing love to them, and because of that she was
getting good returns. You find what you are looking for.                                                                                                                      H.A.
Ironside

 

Of the three great events in the
average human existence —birth, marriage, and death—the central one, marriage,
is the only one in which men and women have a choice. The need, therefore, that
young people should consider well before making their choice of a partner, is
exceedingly important because the effects of such a choice are vital as well as
lasting.

 

Let me mention, in the first
place, the matter of

 

The Equal Yoke

 

Writing as I am to young
Christians, the first thing which I want to say is that God’s will, as revealed
to us in the Scriptures, is that Christian women should marry only Christian
men, and that Christian men should marry only Christian women. The marriage of
a believer with an unbeliever constitutes what is called in Scripture an "unequal
yoke." God’s law on this matter, with the reasons for it, is clearly set
forth in 2 Cor. 6:14-16. I would urge you to ponder those verses very
carefully. They deal with the very basic things of married life, concerning
which it is important that the vital question should be seriously considered:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?" (Amos 3:3). We cannot
urge too strongly the tremendous necessity of ascertaining, before any
friendship is made—which might eventually lead to marriage—that the friend to
be taken into one’s heart is a genuine believer in the Lord Jesus.

 

Besides being of one mind
concerning the Christian faith there are certain other things necessary if the
marriage is to be an ideally happy one. When two distinct personalities are to
spend life together, some very practical things are essential. Knowing this,
the Heavenly Father has given, for the guidance of young men, and particularly
for Christian young men, a full length portrait of one who would make an ideal
wife; and He has likewise given a similar portrait of one who would make an
ideal husband. Let me bring these two portraits before you.

 

The Message to the Young Men

 

My brother, before you ever
contemplate asking any young woman to marry you, I would counsel you to read
prayerfully and repeatedly the words contained in Proverbs 31:10-31. The
superlative value of the woman described in these verses cannot be expressed.
"Her price is far above rubies" (v. 10). The ruby was the most
precious gem known to the ancients; and in this description of "Mrs.
Far-above-Rubies," the wise Counselor makes it crystal clear that, while
men can build houses, women alone can make homes.

 

Of her many fine qualities,
there are four which stand out pre-eminently.

 

1. She is trustworthy. "The
heart of her husband doth safely trust in her" (v. 11). Observe that it is
his heart that trusts in her. The heart is the seat of the affections.
He is not so much concerned about his goods and her care over them. It is her
love for him that he prizes above all. What would be the charm and delight of
goods and possessions without her presence and her love?

 

His heart "doth safely trust
in her." It is no misplaced confidence; she will never disappoint him or
let him down. "She will do him good and not evil all the days of her
life" (v. 12).

 

2. She is industrious. "She
seeketh wool and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands." "She
looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of
idleness" (vv. 13 and 27).

 

3. She is benevolent. "She
stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea she reacheth forth her hands to the
needy" (v. 20). She never forgets that helpfulness is the rent we ought to
pay for living in this world. And so she does all the good she can, to all the
people she can, in all the ways she can, as long as ever she can.

 

4. She is kindhearted. "She
openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of
kindness" (v. 26). A law—like the law of gravitation—is something that
operates unceasingly; and the wisdom and kindness that characterize her every
utterance are but the incarnation of the lovely and benevolent thoughts which
spring from her heart and mind.

 

Such then, briefly, is heaven’s
description of the woman that would make you an excellent wife; and the
blessings which will flow to you both through union with such an one are set
forth in the same chapter. You will, through her influence, become a man looked
up to and respected by your fellows (v. 23). And the rewards which will come to
her are recounted in vv. 28-31.

 

May I suggest then, young
fellow, that if you are forming a friendship with any young woman, a friendship
which you think might eventually lead to your asking her to become your wife,
you wisely and prayerfully consider, and ask yourself, if she is likely to
possess the excellent worthiness of the woman above described.

 

The Message to the Young Women

 

My sister, before you give any
answer to the great question which some day may be put to you, and in fact,
before you give your heart’s true love to any young man who seeks to pay you
attention and who seems worthy of your trust, I would suggest that you look
thoughtfully and prayerfully at the picture of God’s ideal man as it is drawn
in the 15th Psalm. Verse 1 makes it clear that he is a citizen of Mount Zion, just as Proverbs 31:30 speaks of you as a woman that fears the Lord. Such a
man, one who is truly equipped to dwell in God’s presence, is likely to be one
who would be to you an ideal husband and partner. Observe some of the things
that characterize him:

 

1. He is a man of strict
integrity. "He . . . walketh uprightly and worketh righteousness, and
speaketh the truth in his heart" (v. 2). He appears practically, before
men, that which he is, judicially, before God.

 

2. He has perfect command of his
tongue. "He . . . backbiteth not with his tongue, nor doeth evil to his
neighbor, nor taketh up a reproach against his neighbor" (v. 3). He does
not speak words that rankle, nor does he eagerly listen to tales about other
people.

 

3. He is loyal to his spoken
word. "He . . . sweareth to his own hurt and changeth not" (v. 4).
His word is his bond. And so, in the matter of love, if a man of this caliber
declares his love to the woman he would choose—if he makes it evident that she,
and she alone, is the object of his love —she may absolutely and unreservedly
trust him.

 

4. In money matters he is
discreet. "He . . . putteth not out his money to usury, nor taketh reward
against the innocent" (v. 5). He uses money wisely, discreetly,
beneficently. He does not allow it to become his master. He is certain to
recognize that the best things in life-the joy of a happy home and a hallowed
wedlock—are treasures which money cannot buy. And such an one will prefer the
sacred joy of his partner’s love, and the sweet delight of her presence and
comradeship, to the engrossment of grasping after the gold of earth—the love of
which has devastated many an otherwise happy home, and destroyed many a holy
union. Of this man it is said that he is "immovable" (v. 5). He is
upright and truthful; bitter retorts never fall from his lips; his promises are
never broken; he is generous to the last degree. He is a true Christian gentleman.

 

How Much May Be Expected

 

Having set before you, my young
friends, these two ideals, I must be honest enough to say that if you wait
until you find, in absolute perfection, in the man or the woman who
would be your choice, the traits of character outlined above, your marriage
will have to be postponed until you reach that land where there are no
marriages! (Matt. 22:30). But it is better to have a high ideal, even if one
comes short of it, than to have a low ideal and succeed. You are to be "heirs
together of the grace of life" (1 Peter 3:7); and to ensure your mutual
happiness, each must courteously and constantly consider the well-being of the
other. Courtesy is like an air-cushion; it eases the jolts of life. When a man,
for example, experiences that his wife unvaryingly speaks to him in gentlest
and kindest tones, he will not carelessly tax her by making a habit of arriving
home late for dinner. When occasion arises that he is to be unavoidably
detained at business, he will, if at all possible, advise her to that effect.
And where a woman is aware that her husband is generous towards her in money
matters, she will not spend carelessly or extravagantly or on unnecessary
things; she will wisely practice thrift. And thus together they may have the joy
and privilege of sometimes being a help to others.

 

In these days in which our lot
is cast, no form of testimony for God is more urgently needed than that which
is furnished by happy Christian homes. May your home, by and by, be such a
home, my young friend, and may you have the joy that comes from recognizing the
Lord Jesus as its supreme Head.

 

"Beloved, let us love one
another:for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and
knoweth God. He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love. In this was
manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent His only begotten
Son into the world, that we might live through Him. Herein is love, not that we
loved God, but that He loved us, and sent His Son to be the propitiation for
our sins" (1 John 4:7-10).

 

First among the fruit of the
Spirit listed in Galatians 5 is love. A definition of love is not given
in Scripture, and any definitions given in secular dictionaries will be found
to be very inadequate. But while we may not be able adequately to define love,
Scripture gives us some of the characteristics and manifestations of love.
First of all, the text quoted above indicates that "love is of God"
and "God is love." This is the divine nature, the very nature of God.
And this love has been manifested toward us in God’s sending His only begotten
Son into the world to be the propitiation for our sins. Thus this love has a
self-sacrificial quality in it. God, in His love, gave His Son; Christ, in His
love, gave Himself. "Christ also hath loved us, and hath given Himself for
us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling savor" (Eph.
5:2). "Christ also loved the Church, and gave Himself for it" (Eph.
5:25).

 

This love is not dependent on
any quality or response found in the object of the love. This love is above all
circumstances. It is far different from the "love" so manifest in
this world which ebbs and flows according to the behavior of the object loved.
As another has expressed it:"The love’ here has no source in the
creature; it ‘is of God’; and if God were not the spring and power, not a soul
could be saved!, nor a saint walk in His love. For love knows how to bring out
all the resources of grace where man lies in utter ruin. See it in Christ who
died for our sins, and lives to be Advocate with the Father. What love in both
ways!"

 

This same love is part of the
new nature given to all who are born of God. Thus we are exhorted to "love
one another." Again, let us emphasize, this love of which we speak is
independent of the love of others toward us. Remember the words of our Lord
Jesus Christ, "If ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not
even the publicans the same?" (Matt. 5:46). Again quoting another:
"The great principle laid down here is that after we have been born of God
and are partakers of the divine nature, we will not wait for people to love us,
to behave themselves in a way satisfactory to us, but however they behave
themselves we will go on loving them just the same. That is divine love manifested
through the new nature.”

 

Let us now consider some of the
specific characteristics of love. For this we turn to the ‘love" chapter,
1 Corinthians 13. (In quoting from this chapter we will read "love"
in place of the word "charity.")

 

"Though I speak with the
tongues of men and of angels, and have not love, I am become as sounding brass,
or a tinkling cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand
all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could
remove mountains, and have not love, I am nothing." The greatest spiritual
gifts are worth nothing if manifested apart from love. If I am displaying my
gift in a way to gain for myself the glory and acclaim of men, there is no love
in it, only selfishness. Love would lead me to use my gift to help others
achieve God’s highest purposes and blessings for them, whatever the cost to me.

 

"And though I bestow all my
goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not
love, it profiteth me nothing." You may ask, "But how could anyone do
these things apart from love?" The answer is that one might do such things
out of selfishness, expecting something in return, such as the praise of men,
the favor or mercy of God, or the like.

 

"Love suffereth long"
or literally, "Love has a long temper." It counts to ten (or a
thousand), so to speak. Love shows self-restraint in not hastily retaliating in
the face of provocation. "The Lord … is longsuffering to usward, not
willing that any should perish" (2 Peter 3:9).

 

"[Love] is kind."
"Be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as
God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you" (Eph. 4:32). "He [God] is
kind unto the unthankful and to the evil" (Luke 6:35).

 

"Love envieth not" or
really, "Love is never jealous." Do we not often become unhappy when
others are preferred before us? This is selfishness. Love delights to see our
brother or neighbor or colleague honored and esteemed. "Rejoice with them
that do rejoice" (Rom. 12:15).

 

"Love vaunteth not itself,
is not puffed up." Love does not boast, or brag, or in any way draw
attention to itself. Neither does it become puffed up in pride of self and its
abilities, accomplishments, genealogy, or offspring.

 

"[Love] doth not behave
itself unseemly," that is, in an unbecoming or shameful manner. And not
only must we guard against behaving in a shameful manner, but let us remember
that "it is a shame even to speak of those things which are done of
them in secret" (Eph. 5:12).

 

"[Love] seeketh not her own."
What is it that occupies our attention and energies the most:seeking to
promote our own interests, reputation, wealth, or honor, or that of the Lord
and of our fellow men? "Look not every man on his own things, but every
man also on the things of others" (Phil. 2:4).

 

"[Love] is not easily
provoked" or stimulated to anger. We read, "Be ye angry, and sin
not" (Eph. 4:26). The next time you find yourself angry toward someone,
ask yourself whether your anger is solely due to that person’s sin against God,
or whether it may be because that person, in sinning, has offended or slighted you.

 

"[Love] thinketh no
evil," that is, "love does not reckon up or calculatingly consider
the evil done to it (something more than refraining from imputing
motives)" (W. E. Vine). This characteristic of love goes hand in hand with
the preceding characteristic. We may perhaps be able to control our anger, but
if we reckon up the evil done to us and hold in our hearts a grudge or some
bitterness and resentment toward the evildoer, this again is selfishness and
not love. We will never be able to help that person see and judge his sin as
long as we are in such a state ourselves. How easy it is to respond to the sin
or evil of another by committing a sin ourselves. This is sometimes the most
difficult type of sin for a Christian to recognize and judge since he is so
intent on concentrating on the sin committed by the other person.

 

"[Love] rejoiceth not in
iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth." How little do we realize the
perverse pleasure we sometimes receive from seeing our brother or our neighbor
fall into sin. It may be that a brother or a sister has once rebuked you for a
fault or a sin in your life. Unless you have taken this rebuke in a spirit of
love, there will be a tendency for you to gloat, inwardly at least, if you
learn of that other brother or sister committing a sin.

 

"[Love] beareth all things,
believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things."
"Beareth" here means "to hold out against something which
threatens," and "endureth" means "to bear up courageously
and patiently under a trial." Again, it is self-love, or the opposite of
the divine love of which we are speaking, which leads us to give in to the
enemy of our souls or to break down under a severe trial. Love believes and
hopes all things, that is, love is not prone to be suspicious, but rather
credits people with the best possible motives. How prone we are, on the
contrary, to make snap judgments of people and their actions. Sometimes it
almost seems as if we prefer to believe and hope the worst about people.

 

May our hearts be challenged as
we study from Scripture what "love"—that divine love which is God’s
very nature—is, and what its characteristics are. Does love characterize our
behavior toward God and toward our fellow men? Or are we living for self,
seeking our own things? "For all seek their own, not the things which are
Jesus Christ’s" (Phil. 2:21).