Love is the charm of God’s holy book, as it will be our greatest wonder in eternal glory. Its grand design, its matchless methods, its final triumphs, all unite to add charm upon charm to the story that fills the pages of Holy Scripture.

        Not only is the story of God’s own love recorded in the Book, but examples of the love of others, illustrating or typifying it, are found in abundant and engaging variety. Let us take a rapid glance at a few of these.

Exploits of Love

        It was love for Joseph that made a pilgrim of aged, crippled Jacob, as with joy he exclaimed, “I will go and see him before I die” (Gen. 45:28).

        Love to Naomi made a devoted follower of Ruth the Moabitess. She said, in effect, “Her company is better than my country, with every prospect it could possibly hold out to me” (Ruth 1:11-16).

        Love made Rizpah, Miriam, and Mary Magdalene patient, self-forgetting watchers. Love made all three bold and fearless in a dark and lonely hour (2 Sam. 21:10; Exod. 2:4; John 20:11).

        Love to David made a stranger of Mephibosheth. It was as though he had said, “If I cannot reach him in the place where he has gone, my separation from the order of things from which he has been unrighteously rejected shall be as distinctly marked as I can possibly make it” (2 Sam. 19:24-30).

        Love led Jonathan to self-sacrifice. “He stripped himself of the robe that was upon him, and gave it to David; and his garments, even to his sword, and to his bow, and to his girdle” (1 Sam. 18:3,4).

        Love made the Hebrew servant a slave forever. The company of those he loved was more to him than liberty without them. “I love my master, my wife, and my children; I will not go out free” (Exod. 21:5).

Triumphs and Rewards of Love

        Jacob’s eyes got a feast of satisfaction in seeing royal honors covering his beloved Joseph.

        Ruth got into the royal line of God’s chosen people.

        Miriam saw her brother brought into royal circumstances.

        Rizpah saw her sons get a royal burial.

        Jonathan got royal love in return for loyal affections; and in love David exceeded.

        Mephibosheth, when David returned in peace, was restored to royal associations.

        Mary Magdalene got more than all earthly royalty could bestow; she was given the first interview with the Lord of glory after He had risen from the dead; and she was entrusted with one of the most wonderful communications ever listened to by human ears:“I ascend unto My Father and your Father; and to My God and your God.” In seeking Him she got, like Miriam, a joyful message for those dear to Him.

The Apostle Paul

        The apostle Paul seemed, well-nigh, to compass them all:

        Like Miriam, he watched with tenderest affection over those who belonged to the absent One, who loved both them and him (1 Thess. 2:7,8).

        Like Mary Magdalene, he was entrusted with marvelous revelations for Christ’s brethren (2 Cor. 12:7), and by special revelation it was part of his service, under inspiration, to “complete the word of God”(Col. 1:25).

        Like Jacob, his desire was to depart and be with the One he loved, whose desires were towards him (Phil. 1:23).

        Like Mephibosheth, he regarded the world as crucified to him, and he to the world (Gal. 6:14).

        Like Jonathan, he counted all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Him to whom he owed everything, “Christ Jesus, my Lord” (Phil. 3:8).

        Like the Hebrew servant, he was glad for the sake of others to remain here the bondslave of Jesus Christ. He loved his Master. His heart went out in earnest for all God’s saints, many of them his children in the gospel.

        “To abide in the flesh is more needful for you,” he wrote to the Philippians. “And having this confidence, I know that I shall abide and continue with you all for your furtherance and joy of faith, that your rejoicing may be more abundant in Jesus Christ” (Phil. 1:24-26).

        This too had its present special reward. Paul’s great comfort in the prison at Rome was the sense of having the Lord’s company and support (2 Tim. 4:17).

        All this was the fruit of responsive love. Behind it all was “the love of Christ that passes knowledge” (Eph. 3:19), the love that “constrains us” (2 Cor. 5:14).

                The love of Christ is the power behind all that He has done for us, and behind all that we have ever done, or ever shall do, acceptably to Himself. Oh, to know that love better! Oh that it may make its own peculiar mark upon every reader!    (From Help and Food, Vol. 24.)

I had the opportunity to look at my grandmother’s prayer list after she was promoted to glory. I saw my name along with many, many other names and specific situations that she was praying for at one time. She was known as a prayer warrior who consistently, dependably prayed for those she promised that she would. One helpful tip that she used was to keep a whiteboard in her kitchen with the most urgent prayer requests. Every time she passed the whiteboard and saw the names, she would pray for those people.

        Another prayer warrior was the apostle Paul. He encouraged the ones on his prayer list by telling them that he was praying for them and no doubt he followed through on his promises. He made time to pray. “I … cease not to give thanks for you, making mention of you in my prayers” (Eph. 1:15,16). “Always in every prayer of mine for you all making request with joy” (Phil. 1:4). “For this cause we also, since the day we heard it, do not cease to pray for you” (Col. 1:9). “Wherefore also we pray always for you” (2 Thess. 1:11).

        Paul also was not ashamed to request for prayer to be made on his behalf. His requests often centered on boldness to speak the Word, but he also prayed for deliverance from unbelievers, ability to make a journey, and refreshment.

        Let us consider Paul’s example and pray consistently and often for the spiritual needs of each of our prayer recipients along with their many other needs as well. Doing so will fill our hearts with praise to the One who “ever lives to make intercession for [us]” (Heb. 7:25). 

The Apostle Paul’s Prayer List

        The apostle thanked the Lord for the believers in different places (Rom. 1:8; 1 Cor. 1:14; Eph. 1:16; Phil. 1:3; Col. 1:3; 1 Thess. 1:2; 2 Thess. 1:3; 2:13; 2 Tim. 1:3; Philem. 4). In addition, he prayed for the believers that they might:

(To Saints in Ephesus)

•          Be given the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ (1:17).

•          Have their understanding enlightened (1:18).

•          Know the hope of their calling and the riches of the glory of the Lord’s inheritance in the saints (1:18).

•          Know the exceeding greatness of the Lord’s power toward us who believe (1:19).

•          Be strengthened with might by His Spirit in the inner man (3:16).

•          Have Christ dwelling in their hearts by faith (3:17).

•          Be rooted and grounded in love (3:17).

•          Comprehend the breadth, length, depth, and height (3:18).

•          Know the love of Christ (3:19).

•          Be filled with all the fullness of God (3:19).

(To Saints in Philippi)

•          Have love abounding in knowledge and judgment (1:9).

•       Approve things that are excellent and be sincere and without offense till the day of Christ (1:10).

•       Be filled with the fruits of righteousness (1:11).

(To Saints in Colosse)

•          Be filled with the knowledge of the Lord’s will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding (1:9).

•          Walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing (1:10).

•          Be fruitful in every good work (1:10).

•          Increase in the knowledge of God (1:10).

•          Be strengthened with all might, according to His glorious power (1:11).

•          Have patience and longsuffering with joyfulness (1:11).

•          Have hearts comforted, being knit together in love (2:2).

(To Saints in Thessalonica)

•       Be counted worthy of the calling (2 Thess. 1:11).

•       Have God’s good pleasure of His goodness fulfilled (1:11).

•       Have God’s work of faith with power fulfilled (1:11).

•       Have the name of our Lord Jesus Christ glorified in them and they in Him (1:12). 

Paul’s Requests for Prayer

        The apostle asked the believers in different places to pray for him that:

(From Saints in Rome)

•       He may be delivered from unbelievers in Judea (Rom. 15:31).

•       His service may be accepted by the saints in Jerusalem (15:31).

•       He may come unto them with joy by the will of God (15:32).

•       He may be refreshed with those in Rome (15:32).

(From Saints in Ephesus)

•       Utterance may be given to him (Eph. 6:19).

•       He may open his mouth boldly, to make known the mystery of the gospel (6:19).

(From Saints in Colosse)

•       God would open unto him and his co-laborers a door of utterance to speak the mystery of Christ (Col. 4:3).

•       He may make it manifest as he ought to speak (4:4).

(From Saints in Thessalonica)

•       The word of the Lord may have free course and be glorified (2 Thess. 3:1).

•       They may be delivered from unreasonable and wicked men (3:2).

                What would happen if we would make Paul’s prayer list our own and begin praying like this for each other? I know it would certainly improve the quality of my prayers if I did this.

In Acts 21:1-6, we find the apostle Paul approaching the end of his third missionary journey. Paul’s travels up to this point had brought him through many hardships along the way. Demetrius the silversmith, in his opposition to the gospel, had nearly incited a riot in Ephesus, producing a very threatening situation for the apostle and his companions. Additionally, at various other points along the path of this missionary journey, the Jews who opposed the gospel lay in wait for Paul, making travel very dangerous. Now, what is it, do you think, that would cause this dear Christian to subject himself to such dangers and troubles in order to encourage his fellow believers in far away places, and spread the gospel to those who had not yet heard? I believe the answer is love! We read in 1 John 4:7,8, “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is of God; and every one who loves is born of God, and knows God. He who loves not knows not God, for God is love.”

        Paul, motivated by the love of God, was steadfast in encouraging the saints and spreading the precious seed of the gospel wherever he went. In Acts 19:21, we read that the dear apostle became convinced that he must return to Judea and go to Jerusalem. According to Acts 20:22-24, Paul was made well aware by the Holy Spirit that trials awaited him at Jerusalem, but he remained firm in his conviction that he must go there, come what may:“And now, behold, I go bound in the spirit unto Jerusalem, not knowing the things that shall befall me there, save that the Holy Spirit witnesses in every city, saying that bonds and afflictions abide me. But none of these things move me, neither count I my life dear unto myself, so that I might finish my course with joy, and the ministry, that I have received of the Lord Jesus, to testify the gospel of the grace of God.” Paul knew very well that trouble was before him if he went to Jerusalem. Bonds and affliction awaited him at the least; but for the love of God in his heart, and his desire to finish his course with joy, he was determined to press on.

        After praying with the elders of the Ephesians at Miletus (Acts 20), Paul boarded a ship and sailed for the seaport city of Tyre in Syria:“And it came to pass, that after we were gotten from them, and had launched, we came with a straight course unto Coos, and the day following unto Rhodes, and from thence unto Patara; and finding a ship sailing over unto Phenicia, we went aboard, and set forth” (21:1,2).

        Tyre was an ancient seaport city on the eastern coast of the Mediterranean Sea. It was from this port that, in Old Testament times, ships had brought the cedars of Lebanon that were ultimately delivered to Solomon for the house of God. Ships carrying cargoes from Africa, Italy, Greece, and Asia Minor had sailed to this port for centuries carrying goods to be traded, and caravans from the far and middle east brought trade goods to be exchanged in this city making this a great center of commerce. With all the mingling of people and different cultures from all over the known world, the city had a reputation for worldliness. It was into this scene that the apostle sailed on his ship which was scheduled to unload its cargo at Tyre:“Now when we had discovered Cyprus, we left it on the left hand, and sailed into Syria, and landed at Tyre, for there the ship was to unlade her burden” (21:3).

        Paul needed to go on to Caesarea, but as no ship was apparently headed that direction right away, Paul and his companions disembarked and went into the city. I think it is important to note that in spite of the many and varied attractions that such a city may have afforded to men of the world, these saints preferred the company of the people of God:“And finding disciples, we tarried there seven days” (21:4). What a joy it must have been for Paul and his company to find believers in such a worldly place as Tyre! Have you ever found those of like precious faith in places where you did not expect to meet them? Many times as I have traveled over the years, my heart has been cheered to find believers in many distant places, and what an encouragement it has always been to enjoy together, if even for a brief time, the wonderful things of Christ! I don’t know whether Paul previously knew these Christians at Tyre or whether this was a first meeting, but the immediate bond of love between these brothers and sisters in Christ was quite evident. The apostle and his companions tarried with these disciples seven days, and one can only imagine how they occupied the time. I am sure there were meetings for the teaching of God’s Word and prayer; I am guessing too that they had time to remember the Lord together on the Lord’s Day (compare 20:7). What a blessing it must have been for them to enjoy together the fellowship that Christians have in Christ; is that not a foretaste of glory?

        That bond of love between Christians was evident in several ways. First of all, the believers in Tyre, when they found out that Paul had in mind to go to Jerusalem, faithfully expressed the message that the Holy Spirit laid on their hearts, even though this message seemed contrary to the apostle’s plans. I believe their motivation included their sincere concern for the apostle’s safety. We read in verse 4 that the disciples of Tyre “said to Paul through the Spirit that he should not go up to Jerusalem.” Paul loved his fellow Christians enough to go on a dangerous and arduous journey all through the middle east in part to encourage and bless them, and this love extended to the saints and his countrymen in Jerusalem where he was determined to go, yet where his life would be in great danger. The saints in Tyre loved and cared enough for the apostle that they did not want to see him come to harm, and this love caused them to speak the truth that the Spirit of God gave them, even though that message must have been difficult to deliver.

        But in the end, Paul remained convinced that he must go to Jerusalem despite the dangers, and now he received the blessing and support of all the saints in this meeting:“And when we had accomplished those days, we departed and went our way; and they all brought us on our way, with wives and children, till we were out of the city:and we kneeled down on the shore, and prayed” (21:5). Is not this a beautiful picture of the love of God that brethren should have for one another? Note that the apostle held no disdain toward the Christians at Tyre for daring to give him a word from the Holy Spirit that was contrary to his own desires and plans. By the same token, the folks at Tyre were not miffed at Paul’s rejection of their warnings. The loving humility expressed on both sides is impressive.

        On the day that Paul planned to leave Tyre and continue his journey to Jerusalem, with great troubles and trials awaiting him there, it must have cheered and comforted his heart greatly to have the entire assembly turn out to conduct him and his companions on their way! Not only the elders accompanied him, but all the Christians of the place, the men, women, the boys, and the girls came along! All of them left the city with Paul and walked with him down to the sea. I can almost imagine the scene—the smell of the salt breeze blowing inland, sea gulls calling, and the waves rolling rhythmically up onto the beach. Out in the harbor, perhaps the ship that Paul and his friends meant to board lay bobbing at its moorings. There upon that beach the entire company of believers knelt down in the sand and prayed together. Those prayers, I am sure, went both ways. Paul was undoubtedly praying for his beloved fellow believers in Tyre, and they were most certainly praying for him and the journey before him. This is how all the plans of the saints should be conducted, don’t you agree?

        I am confident that as Paul took his leave of these Christians of Tyre, and as the assembly dusted off the sand from their knees and began to walk back to the city, the bond of love between them all remained strong, though they might not have expected to meet on earth again. Also, the prayers for one another were, I expect, frequent over time as a continual evidence of that love.

        My dear brethren, the bond of love between us as believers is deeper and more abiding than the bonds between family members according to the flesh. Perhaps there are those of His children that God has privileged us to encounter only briefly while in this scene, yet what an encouragement we can be to them and they to us as we share together the precious things of Christ, and as we continually lift one another up in prayer. We may not be in the position of laying down our lives in the service of the Lord as Paul seemed to be faced with, but let us not fail to love one another.

        Remember the Word of God in 1 John 4, “Beloved, let us love one another:for love is of God.” All real love finds its source in God, for God is love. God so loved us that he gave His only begotten Son that we might have life in Him. We read in 1 John 4:10,11:“Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another.”

                It is the love of God for one another that will cause us to seek to encourage and bless the saints, even when it means going out of our way. It is the love of God that causes Christians to seek out the fellowship of believers rather than the glittering attractions of this world. In Hebrews 10:25,26 we are exhorted, “Let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is, but exhorting one another:and so much the more, as you see the day approaching.” It is the love of God that causes us to pray for one another, even for those in distant places:“Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints” (Eph. 6:18). My dear brethren, let us love one another!

“Beloved, let us love one another:for love is of God; and every one who loves is born of God, and knows God. He who loves not knows not God; for God is love. In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because God sent His only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through Him. Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us, and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins” (1 John 4:7-10).

        Scripture does not give us a definition of love, and any definitions given in secular dictionaries will be found to be very inadequate. But while we may not be able adequately to define love, Scripture gives us some of the characteristics and manifestations of love. First of all, the text quoted above indicates that “love is of God” and “God is love.” This is the divine nature, the very nature of God. And this love has been manifested toward us in God’s sending His only begotten Son into the world to be the propitiation for our sins. Thus this love has a self-sacrificial quality in it. God, in his love, gave His Son; Christ, in His love, gave Himself. “Christ also has loved us, and has given Himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling savor” (Eph. 5:2). “Christ also loved the Church, and gave Himself for it” (Eph. 5:25).

        This love is not dependent on any quality or response found in the object of the love. “God commends His love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us” (Rom. 5:8). This love is above all circumstances. It is far different from the “love” so prevalent in this world that ebbs and flows according to the behavior of the object loved. As another has expressed it:“The ‘love’ here has no source in the creature; it ‘is of God’; and if God were not the spring and power, not a soul could be saved, nor a saint walk in His love. For love knows how to bring out all the resources of grace where man lies in utter ruin. See it in Christ who died for our sins, and lives to be Advocate with the Father. What love in both ways!” (W. Kelly, Exposition of the Epistles of John).

        This same love is part of the new nature given to all who are born of God. Thus we are exhorted to “love one another.” Again, let us emphasize, this love of which we speak is independent of the love of others toward us. Remember the words of our Lord Jesus Christ, “If you love those who love you, what reward have you? do not even the publicans the same?” (Matt. 5:46). Again quoting another:“The great principle laid down here is that after we have been born of God and are partakers of the divine nature, we will not wait for people to love us, to behave themselves in a way satisfactory to us, but however they behave themselves we will go on loving them just the same. That is divine love manifested through the new nature” (H. A. Ironside, Addresses on the Epistles of John.)

 

Characteristics of Love

        Let us now consider some of the specific characteristics of love. For this we turn to the “love” chapter, 1 Corinthians 13. (In quoting from this chapter we will read “love” in place of the word “charity.”)

        “Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not love, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not love, I am nothing.” The greatest spiritual gifts are worth nothing if manifested apart from love. If I am displaying my gift in a way to gain for myself the glory and acclaim of men, there is no love in it, only selfishness. Love would lead me to use my gift to help others achieve God’s highest purposes and blessings for them, whatever the cost to me.

        “And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not love, it profits me nothing.” You may ask, “But how could anyone do these things apart from love?” The answer is that one might do such things out of selfishness, expecting something in return, such as the praise of men, the favor or mercy of God, or the like.

        “Love suffers long” or literally, “Love has a long temper.” It counts to ten (or a thousand), so to speak. Love shows self-restraint in not hastily retaliating in the face of provocation. “The Lord … is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish” (2 Pet. 3:9).

        “[Love] is kind.” “Be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake has forgiven you” (Eph. 4:32). “He [God] is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil” (Luke 6:35).

        “Love envies not” or really, “Love is never jealous.” Do we not often become unhappy when others are preferred before us? This is selfishness. Love delights to see our brother or neighbor or colleague honored and esteemed. “Rejoice with those who do rejoice” (Rom. 12:15).

        “Love vaunts not itself, is not puffed up.” Love does not boast, or brag, or in any way draw attention to itself. Neither does it become puffed up in pride of self and its abilities, accomplishments, genealogy, or offspring.

        “[Love] does not behave itself unseemly,” that is, in an unbecoming or shameful manner. And not only must we guard against behaving in a shameful manner, but let us remember that “it is a shame even to speak of those things that are done of them in secret” (Eph. 5:12).

        “[Love] seeks not her own.” What is it that occupies our attention and energies the most:seeking to promote our own interests, reputation, wealth, or honor, or those of the Lord and of our fellow men? “Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others” (Phil. 2:4).

        “[Love] is not easily provoked” or stimulated to anger. We read, “Be angry, and sin not” (Eph. 4:26). The next time you find yourself angry toward someone, ask yourself whether your anger is due solely to that person’s sin against God, or whether it may be because that person, in sinning, has offended or slighted you personally.

        “[Love] thinks no evil,” that is, “love does not reckon up or calculatingly consider the evil done to it (something more than refraining from imputing motives)” (W. E. Vine, An Expository Dictionary of New Testament Words). This characteristic of love goes hand in hand with the preceding characteristic. We may perhaps be able to control our anger, but if we reckon up the evil done to us and hold in our hearts a grudge or some bitterness and resentment toward the evildoer, this again is selfishness and not love. We will never be able to help that person see and judge his sin as long as we are in such a state ourselves. How easy it is to respond to the sin or evil of another by committing a sin ourselves. This is sometimes the most difficult type of sin for a Christian to recognize and judge since he is so intent on concentrating on the sin committed by the other person.

        “[Love] rejoices not in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth.” How little do we realize the perverse pleasure we sometimes receive from seeing our brother or our neighbor fall into sin. It may be that a brother or a sister has once rebuked you for a fault or a sin in your life. Unless you have taken this rebuke in a spirit of love, there will be a tendency for you to gloat, inwardly at least, if you learn of that other brother or sister committing a sin.

        “[Love] bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” “Bears” here means “to hold out against something that threatens,” and “endures” means “to bear up courageously and patiently under a trial.” Again, it is self-love, or the opposite of the divine love of which we are speaking, that leads us to give in to the enemy of our souls or to break down under a severe trial. Love believes and hopes all things, that is, love is not prone to be suspicious, but rather credits people with the best possible motives. How prone we are, on the contrary, to make snap judgments of people and their actions. Sometimes it almost seems as if we prefer to believe and hope the worst about people.

 

Love in the Marriage Relationship

        Here are expressions sometimes spoken by married persons:“I wish my husband would try to understand me.” “My wife just is not meeting my needs.” “What am I getting out of this marriage?”

        John 3:16 does not say, “God loved the world so that He could get love in return.” Rather, “He gave!” If we give to our mate with the idea of getting something in return, we may often be disappointed. We may come to the point of saying, “Forget it. I will never try to give him/her anything again.” But this is not love; it is not the way God has loved each one of us.

        Loving is giving, giving, giving, and giving some more. How much did Christ love us? How much did He give? “Walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and has given himself for us an offering … to God” (Eph. 5:2).

        In a study of 750 couples with marital difficulties, the most commonly reported problem was a partner who was in love with himself or herself. The second most common problem reported by these couples was indifference on the part of one of the partners. Both of these problems—selfishness and indifference—are opposites of the love that is a fruit of the Spirit.

        Husbands:Do you love your wife? Wives:Do you love your husband? Really? Do you love your partner sacrificially, just as Christ loved the Church? Are you willing to give up some or all of your own interests, time, friends, hobbies, and/or pleasures in order to bring your wife or husband the greatest pleasure and happiness? Have you ever tried to find out what things make your partner happy? If you knew that your wife hated some activity that you enjoy, would you give it up, or greatly cut back on it, in order to spend time with her doing things she likes to do?

        You may ask, “What if I am the only one who gives? What if my partner receives it all without giving anything in return?” First, you may need to become more alert to—and show appreciation for—the little bit of love your partner does show to you. You may even have to ask others to help you to overcome your blind spot concerning the love that your partner shows to you. But even if you cannot find any evidence of loving or giving by your partner, you have the glorious privilege of loving and giving as Christ did—who died for the ungodly, for sinners, and for His enemies (Rom. 5:6-10). Dear brother or sister, be encouraged to persist in this activity of true love! “Be not weary in well doing, for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not” (Gal. 6:9). I have no doubt that God has prepared special rewards for those who are content to give and give and give without receiving anything in return.

        May our hearts be challenged as we study from Scripture what “love”—the divine love that is God’s very nature—is, and what its characteristics are. Does love characterize our behavior toward God and toward our fellow men? Or are we living for self, seeking our own things? “For all seek their own, not the things that are Jesus Christ’s” (Phil. 2:21).

 

        “Let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth” (1 John 3:18).

        There is a vast difference between preaching love and living it. It is easy to preach it, for it is claiming it from others for our own ease. But living it is quite another thing, for in a scene such as we are going through, in which every expression of the God of love finds opposition, there can be no practice of what is really love save in self-denial and suffering.

        (From Help and Food, Vol. 24.)

 

        Peter tells us to add to godliness, brotherly affection (2 Pet. 1:7). That is to say, mere godliness will not do; we must have with godliness the warmth of Christian friendship, brotherly affection. How stiffly, hardly, with what grinding and creaking, the machine sometimes moves, and perhaps won’t move at all, until a few drops of oil make it all right and smooth. So is love among brethren. Love surmounts the difficulties of the day, conquers coldness and apathy, and goes forth winning the hearts of the saints in order to serve them.

                (By E.J. Thomas in The Bible Treasury, Vol. N8.)

“Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another” (1 John 4:11).

        We must not think of love as an uncontrollable, unpredictable emotion. We are commanded to love, and this would be quite impossible if love were some elusive, sporadic sensation, coming as unaccountably as a common cold. Love does involve the emotions but it is more a matter of the will than of the emotions.

        We must also guard against the notion that love is confined to a world of dream castles with little relation to the nitty-gritty of everyday life. For every hour of moonlight and roses, there are weeks of mops and dirty dishes.

        In other words, love is intensely practical. For instance, when a plate of bananas is passed at the table and one has black spots, love takes that one. Love cleans the wash basin and bathtub after using them. Love replaces paper towels when the supply is gone so that the next person will not be inconvenienced. Love puts out the lights when they are not in use. It picks up the crumpled Kleenex instead of walking over it. It replaces the gas and oil after using a borrowed car. Love empties the garbage without being asked. It does not keep people waiting. It serves others before self. It takes a squalling baby out so as not to disturb the meeting. Love speaks loudly so that the deaf can hear. And love works in order to have the means to share with others.

        (From One Day at a Time, January 26, Gospel Folio Press, Grand Rapids, Michigan; used by permission.)

 

        “Speaking the truth in love” (Eph. 4:15).

        It is no mean victory over oneself to have learned to open our lips only for the good of others. It costs much to withhold that which, while it may be pleasing to ourselves, is unprofitable, or worse, to others. Oh for more in us of the love that does no harm to the neighbor, but only good!

        Nor does this mean that our words must be of the sort that pleases everybody. Far be it from us to seek to be men-pleasers. This is not love. But it is love, whatever the words may have to be, when the burden of the heart is the blessing of our fellows. Scripture uses strong words sometimes, but its mind is ever the good of the hearers.

                (From Help and Food, Vol. 24.)

The preceding article on “Prayer Lists” reminds me of an experience I had a few years ago. We employed a home handyman who had done work for us several times previously to install new storm doors on our house. We gave him a down payment so he could purchase the doors. Months passed with no response to our repeated phone calls. Finally, six months later, he came to our door and apologized profusely for the long delay. He ashamedly admitted that because he hadn’t gotten any jobs for months he had used our down payment to put food on the table for his family.

        I forgave him, and, because we had known him so long and he had done such good work for us in the past, I gave him another down payment. But I also took the opportunity to ask him some questions. He had a strong Christian testimony and was (and still is) a member of a large evangelical church in our community. I asked him if he had told his pastor about not having any work. He replied that he had just done that the past week. I asked him if he had asked other members of the church to pray for him that he might get work, or if he had posted a note on the church bulletin board about his availability to do home improvement projects. He answered, “No.”

        What a shame! We are “members one of another in the body of Christ” (Rom. 12:5). God has purposed this that we might have “compassion one of another” (1 Pet. 3:8), “pray one for another” (Jas. 5:16), build up or “edify one another” (1 Thess. 5:11), and help one another in times of need.

                God doesn’t expect people to read our minds. Also, God often is pleased to use other people to answer our prayers. So let us not be too ashamed or embarrassed or proud to share our needs with our fellow believers. As pointed out in the previous article, even the great apostle Paul asked his fellow believers for prayer for himself. Let us humble ourselves and follow the apostle’s example.

“Let love be unfeigned” (Rom. 12:9 JND).

        This is the first of the apostle’s general admonitions in this chapter, and may be considered the foundation and summary of all the others. He who shines in this grace will abound in every good work. As we consider a love that is free from all dissimulation (or pretending) and guile, what a wondrous sight it is in a world of hollow pretense! But where is it to be found in practical exercise? God only is its source, “for love is of God” (1 John 4:7). It is Himself; God is love, not merely loving, but love. And should not His children be the expression of His nature, His moral character? “Every one who loves is born of God, and knows God. He who loves not knows not God; for God is love” (1 John 4:7,8). Faith goes on to say, “We have known and believed the love that God has to us. God is love; and he who dwells in love dwells in God, and God in him” (4:16). Here is the true character of communion and the power of walking in love.

        In this portion in 1 John we have divine love manifested in the conversion of the sinner, the communion of the saint, and his complete conformity to Christ for ever. Love meets him as a lost sinner, makes him like Christ, fits him for communion with God while here, and perfects him for the coming day of judgment so that he has nothing to fear. He sees his way clear into the glory beyond the tribunal of Christ, where love alone remains, for heaven is its home.

                Surely, then, the exhortation of the apostle is a most reasonable one:“Let love be unfeigned.” What else could a Christian be but pure-hearted in his love? He dwells at the fountain of eternal love, feeds upon it, delights in it, and ought to be its full and fair reflection. What could excuse him for allowing a feigned or pretending love to take the place of Christian affection? A love so high in its source, so divine in its nature, so pure in its character, should be guarded by us with all holy jealousy. It is surely of greatest importance that every Christian should be true before God in the expression and the assertion of his love toward others, whether within or outside the Church. To mislead, or gain an advantage over others by a fair but false profession of love has a character of iniquity that is very distinctive. The corruption of that which is so pure in its source is an evil that we should constantly and diligently watch against.

Was there need for such an exhortation in the apostle’s day, and is there need in ours? Alas, what is it that Christians so fail in as the truthful expression in words of the inmost state of the heart? So few speak or write exactly what they are. Only One, when asked, “Who art thou?” could answer, “Even the same that I said unto you from the beginning” (John 8:25). He could appeal to His words and say, “I am what I speak.” There never was in His words the appearance of what He was not; He was absolutely, and in every particular, what He said (John 8:25). But of none, save the blessed Jesus, could this be said. So deceitful is the human heart, and so false is the world, that nothing but the Holy Spirit, revealing Christ to our souls through the Word, and enabling us to walk in the light as God is in the light, keeps us even as believers from departing from the truth, from slipping into misrepresentation, from saying what we are not, and what we mean not.

        Let us then remember that the apostle declares that the only genuine love is that which is sincere and free from all guile. Jesus is the truth, and so should His disciples also be.

        Self-judgment is especially called for here. Naturally we are unreal. But every one can best judge for himself whether he entertains any feeling in his heart contrary to the outward manifestation of affection. It is quite true that habit may mislead without any intention to deceive, such as the common amenities of life, the inscriptions, the contents, and the signatures of our letters. Still, we must have respect to truth in the heart even when so much form prevails. May the Lord ever keep us free from selfishness and pretension for His own name’s sake!

                (From Meditations on Christian Devotedness.)

How sweet the name of Jesus sounds
In a believer’s ear!
It soothes his sorrows, heals his wounds,
And drives away his fear.

It makes the wounded spirit whole,
And calms the troubled breast;
’Tis manna to the hungry soul,
And to the weary, rest.

Dear Name! the Rock on which we build
Our Shield and Hiding-place!
Our never-failing Treasure, filled
With boundless stores of grace!

Jesus, our Saviour, Shepherd, Friend!
Thou Prophet, Priest and King!
Our Lord, our Life, our Way, our End!
Accept the praise we bring.

From Hymns of Grace and Truth, Horizon Press, San Diego.

We are told distinctly who wrote Psalm 34:“A Psalm of David, when he changed his behavior before Abimelech; who drove him away, and he departed.” Do you remember that incident in David’s life? He was afraid he was going to be slain by King Saul and fled to the court of the Philistines and waited on the king of the Philistines. Just think, David who had overcome the giant Goliath became so discouraged that instead of trusting God he fled to the enemies of his people. He was even ready to go with the Philistine king to battle and would have gone out with them against his own people. How terribly David had fallen! There is no telling how far a saint of God will fall if he gets his eyes off the Lord, if unbelief triumphs instead of faith. Of course it will be only a temporary thing.

      The Philistines themselves said to Achish, King of Gath, “What are you doing with this fellow? This is the man who slew Goliath.” But Achish said, “Oh, Saul has turned against him, and he is going to be my keeper now; he is going to fight for us.” But they said, “We do not want this fellow around. If we go to battle he will turn against us.” They knew that his heart was really with his own people, and they said, no, he cannot go. David was afraid, and we read, He “feigned himself mad in their hands, and scrabbled on the doors of the gate” (1 Sam. 21:13). What a picture! David, the man after God’s own heart, God’s anointed, feigning himself to be crazy because he was now afraid of the Philistines. What a disgusting picture! But no more disgusting than for you or me to go off with the world and act like the world—we who have been called out from it to glorify the Lord Jesus. God came in grace and delivered David from all that, and when he got back among his own people again he wrote this Psalm. David was delivered because Achish would not have him. He was feeling better now; he was back in the right place; he was delivered from the association of the Philistines.

      Verses 1 to 4 are an ascription of praise. “I will bless the LORD at all times; His praise shall continually be in my mouth. My soul shall make her boast in the LORD; the humble shall hear thereof and be glad. O magnify the LORD with me, and let us exalt His name together. I sought the LORD and He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.” If only he had done that in the beginning he would not have failed so dreadfully in the palace of the king of the Philistines; but he had to have that bitter experience to bring him to an end of himself and to thrust him upon God. How often that happens to children of God.

      In verses 5 to 10 you have a wonderful story of his own personal experience of the delivering power of God. That fifth verse has a marvelous lesson, “They looked unto Him and were lightened; and their faces were not ashamed.” “They looked unto Him.” Unto whom? Unto the LORD. And what happened? “They were lightened:and their faces were not ashamed.” Literally it means, “they became radiant.” “They looked unto Him, and became radiant:and their faces were not ashamed.” Remember what the apostle tells us in 2 Corinthians:“But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord” (3:18). Do you want to become a radiant Christian? Do you want to be a Christlike believer? Then do not be self-occupied; do not be looking in all the time trying to see how you are getting along. If you are occupied with your bad self only, you will get discouraged; if occupied with your fancied goodness, you will get puffed up; but if you look away to Him, “Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith” (Heb. 12:2), what happens? “They looked unto Him, and became radiant.” They not only received light themselves, but also they gave out light. Moses went into the presence of God, and when He came from the mount he was radiant; the people could not stand it. What made him radiant? He had been gazing on the face of God. If you want to be a radiant believer, fix your eyes upon Christ. “We all, [reflecting as in a mirror] the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory.” There is not a great deal of radiancy about some of us. We are so grumpy; we are so dull. The Scots have a good word for that:it is “dour,” just glum, and it only tells the story that we are not looking unto Jesus. As we gaze upon His face we become like Him, and the loveliness of Christ shines out in our lives. “They looked unto Him, and became radiant:and their faces were not ashamed.” David says, as it were, “I know, for I remember when I was not radiant.” But he proceeds, “This poor man cried, and the LORD heard him, and saved him out of all his troubles” (34:6). Can you say that?

      And now David learned that he did not need to go to the Philistines for protection. God had a protector for him. “The angel of the LORD encamps round about those who fear Him, and delivers them” (34:7). And he is so delighted at what he has found that he wants everybody else to share it with him and exclaims, “O taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the man who trusts in Him. O fear the Lord, you His saints” (34:8,9). When he speaks of fearing the LORD he does not mean to be afraid of Him, but he means that reverent godly fear that should characterize us. “For there is no want to those who fear Him” (34:9). If you are going about with head drooping all the time, it tells the story that you are not living in His presence, for “there is no want to those who fear Him. The young lions do lack and suffer hunger; but those who seek the LORD shall not want any good thing” (34:9,10). There are many things that you and I think we want that are not good for us, but if we seek Him, if the Lord withholds something that we wanted very much, we can be sure it would not be a good thing for us.

      It is a great thing to learn to depend on Him. That verse we quote so often does not promise that He will do every thing we ask:“Be careful [or anxious] for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God” (Phil. 4:6). And then what? And you will get everything for which you ask? No, “And the peace of God, that passes all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus” (4:7). If you have told Him about it you can leave it with Him and be at perfect peace, and say, “I know that He will do the right thing.” “Those who seek the LORD shall not want any good thing.”       The next group of verses, from 11 to 16, give us the path of life for the believer. “Come, children, hearken unto Me:I will teach you the fear of the LORD. What man is he who desires life, and loves many days, that he may see good? Keep your tongue from evil, and your lips from speaking guile” (34:11-13). What had David been doing in the court of Achish? He had been speaking guile, and he got nothing but misery out of it. Now he is saying that if you want happiness and peace, “Keep your tongue from evil, and your lips from speaking guile. Depart from evil, and do good; seek peace, and pursue it. The eyes of the LORD are upon the righteous, and His ears are open unto their cry. The face of the Lord is against those who do evil” (34:13-16).

      Part of this passage (34:12-16)is quoted in 1 Peter 3:10-12. Notice that Peter stops at “The face of the Lord is against those who do evil” (3:12), but the psalmist continues, “to cut off the remembrance of them from the earth.” Why does Peter not quote that? Because this is not the day when God is cutting off the wicked; this is the day of grace. While the face of the LORD is against those who do evil, He is still dealing with them in mercy, giving them a chance to be saved. The day of judgment has not yet come.

      The next verses give us the experience of the trusting soul:“The righteous cry, and the LORD hears, and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is nigh unto those who are of a broken heart, and saves such as be of a contrite spirit” (34:17,18). What a lot of sad hearts there are in the world, and how the Lord loves to heal those hearts! “He heals the broken in heart, and binds up their wounds” (Psa. 147:3). The world is full of people with broken hearts and shattered hopes, but what a wonderful thing that “the LORD is nigh unto those who are of a broken heart.”

            (From Studies on the Psalms, Horizon Press, San Diego, CA.)

What is bitterness? Let us look at some people in the Bible who were bitter.

      Esau “cried with a great and exceeding bitter cry” when he learned that his twin brother Jacob had cheated him out of his father’s blessing (Gen. 27:30-35; also Heb. 12:15-17).

      The Egyptians made the lives of the children of Israel “bitter with hard bondage, in mortar, and in brick” (Exod. 1:13,14). Later, an even greater load was laid upon the Israelites when they were required to gather the straw to make brick as well as making the bricks, with no reduction in the daily output of finished product (Exod. 5:6-14).

      After losing her husband Elimelech and both her sons, Mahlon and Chilion, Naomi said, “Call me Mara, for the Almighty has dealt very bitterly with me” (Ruth 1:3-5,20,21).

      Hannah “was in bitterness of soul” because of being childless and the constant provocations by her husband’s other wife, Peninnah (1 Sam. 1:2-10).

      Mordecai “cried with a loud and a bitter cry” when he learned that the king had signed a decree to exterminate the Jews from the land (Esth. 3:12-4:3).

      Job complained, “God … breaks me with a tempest, and multiplies my wounds without cause. He will not suffer me to take my breath, but fills me with bitterness” (Job 9:13-18; also 10:1; 13:26; 23:2).

      Peter “went out and wept bitterly” after denying His Lord three times (Matt. 26:69-75).

      That same Peter later diagnosed in Simon the sorcerer “the gall of bitterness, and in the bond of iniquity” after Simon had sought to purchase the power to give the Holy Spirit to people (Acts 8:17-23). 

Causes of Bitterness

      What were the causes of these people’s bitterness? Perhaps the predominant reason was their perception (rightly or wrongly) of being treated unfairly. Esau, the children of Israel in Egypt, Naomi, Hannah, Mordecai, and Job all chafed under the intense injustice of their situation. One can just hear them crying, “Why me?” Of course, we are allowed to view each of these situations from God’s perspective and can see that in each case God was testing His people and in most cases preparing them for a blessed outcome to their trial. Some of these instances of unfair treatment could have been avoided by more godly treatment on the part of the antagonist (such as Esau’s father and brother, Egypt’s Pharaoh, and Hannah’s husband).

      The cause of Simon Peter’s bitter weeping was just the opposite—the realization of how horribly and unfairly he had treated His Lord.

      What about Simon the sorcerer (sometimes referred to as Simon Magus in extra-biblical literature)? Why did Peter label him as having “the gall of bitterness”? Wasn’t Simon simply being covetous and proud? The earlier description of Simon may shed some light on this:“There was a certain man, called Simon, who beforetime in the same city used sorcery, and bewitched the people of Samaria, giving out that himself was some great one:to whom they all gave heed, from the least to the greatest, saying, This man is the great power of God. And to him they had regard, because that of long time he had bewitched them with sorceries” (Acts 8:9-11). So it wasn’t that Simon wanted something he didn’t have. When the apostles came to Samaria and demonstrated far greater power than he possessed, Simon became bitter about losing the adulation and worship of the people of Samaria who were turning to Christ and receiving the gift of the Holy Spirit. No doubt there was also “bitter envying” in Simon’s heart (Jas. 3:14) that carried over from the underlying animosity between the Samaritans and the Jews. 

Exhortations Concerning Bitterness

      With these examples in mind, let us see what the inspired apostolic writers of Scripture have to say about bitterness.

      The apostle Paul writes, “Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice; and be kind one to another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake has forgiven you” (Eph. 4:31,32). It may be difficult to tease distinct meanings out of the words bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, evil speaking, and malice. He uses all of them, along with their opposites in the following verse, to make sure the reader gets the point. However, “bitterness” seems to have the quality of sharpness or harshness, making biting comments, nasty putdowns, and cruel gossip.

      The apostle Paul also writes, “Husbands, love your wives and be not bitter against them” (Col. 3:19). What would cause a husband to be bitter toward his wife? Solomon suggests some possibilities:“It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house” (Prov. 21:9; 25:24). “It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman” (Prov. 21:19). “A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike” (Prov. 27:15; 19:13). In addition, a husband who has a difficult time with his boss or fellow employees may tend to take it out on his wife. He doesn’t dare say anything to his boss for risk of losing his job, and he comes home expecting compassion and sympathy from his wife. However, if his wife has had a difficult day at home and greets her husband with, “Honey, would you please change junior’s diaper and entertain him while I fix supper?” that might throw him over the edge if he is not careful.

      The exhortation of Scripture is for husbands not to be bitter against their wives.  Do wives ever have reason to be bitter toward their husbands? Hannah certainly did, and so do many other wives. But the admonition that the apostle gives to husbands must certainly apply to wives as well:“Be not bitter against them.”

      What if we are treated unfairly or unjustly. Do we have a right to be bitter? No doubt the best thing to do in this situation is to consider the One who was treated more unfairly and unjustly by far than anyone in the history of man. How did this Man respond to such treatment? He prayed, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do” (Luke 23:34). 

A Root of Bitterness

      I have encountered personally or heard of a number of professed Christians who have been totally consumed with bitterness for years and years. One woman continued to be bitter toward her husband for many years after he died because of the way he had treated her. What a physical, emotional, and spiritual toll that woman’s bitterness took on her!  Another woman was bitter toward her sister because she perceived that her sister had received a larger share of their parents’ inheritance. It wasn’t that the woman was impoverished and her sister wealthy. Far from it. It was simply the perceived unfairness of it all that consumed her with bitterness. I cannot help but think that if she had simply cast that burden upon the Lord (Psa. 55:22) she would have ended up infinitely more wealthy materially, emotionally, and spiritually. Also, she would have had more friends.

      Just a couple of weeks ago as I write this, in November 2008, an inmate at the Baltimore City Detention Center told me that he had come to realize that a root of bitterness in him was the underlying cause of his criminal activity and incarceration. Since I had never heard an inmate express such an insight in my 24 years of prison ministry, I asked him to tell me more about it.  He said that he had been bitter toward his mother for many years (I did not ask him to elaborate). When he got married, he transferred his bitterness to his wife. That ultimately led to adultery, divorce, substance abuse, other kinds of criminal activity, and incarceration.

      What a horrible bondage it is to be enmeshed in a root of bitterness! It is hurtful to everyone around. It totally destroys the Christian’s testimony for the Lord. And the one who is filled with bitterness is hurt most of all—among the most miserable persons on the planet. 

Deliverance from Bitterness

      Can one ever be delivered from bitterness? Let us look at the rest of the stories of Naomi, Hannah, Mordecai, and Job.

      The Lord gave Naomi’s daughter-in-law Ruth to her as a gentle encourager. Ruth, by going about her business of providing a living for herself and her mother-in-law, and by sharing with Naomi the ways the Lord was blessing her each day, helped to restore to Naomi an appreciation of the grace of God (Ruth 2:20-22). Ultimately, great honor came to Naomi as the mother-in-law of the great-grandmother of King David.

      Hannah simply committed her cause to the Lord:“If Thou wilt … give unto Thine handmaid a man child, then I will give him unto the LORD all the days of his life” (1 Sam. 1:11). Before long we hear Hannah exulting, “My heart rejoices in the LORD, my horn is exalted in the LORD … I rejoice in Thy salvation” (1 Sam. 2:1), and her son Samuel ultimately became one of the most renowned leaders in the history of the children of Israel.

      Mordecai marshaled all of the Jews living in Shushan to engage in a three day fast that the LORD might change the heart of the king (Esth. 4:16). In the end, we find not only the cause for Mordecai’s bitterness removed but Mordecai himself promoted to be “next unto King Ahasuerus and great among the Jews” (Esth. 10:2,3).

      Job, after losing his children, his wealth, and his health, became bitter toward God for the seeming injustice of these losses. However, the LORD worked with him and revealed Himself more fully to Job so that Job could say in the end, “I abhor myself and repent in dust and ashes” (Job 43:6). “So the LORD blessed the latter end of Job more than his beginning” (43:12).

      My dear reader, are you nursing bitterness, resentment, or a grudge in your heart toward God or another person. You may be placing an inordinate focus on a loss that you have experienced or an injustice you have endured. However, the Lord has something far better in mind for you, something that will cause you totally to forget your loss or injustice. He may even now be using another believer to encourage you to get your focus off yourself and onto the Lord (as Ruth did with Naomi). He may be speaking to you directly (as He did with Job). Or He may want you to turn to Himself in prayer and fasting (as did Hannah and Mordecai) as you seek a reversal of the cause of your bitterness or else deliverance from the bitterness itself.

      Of one thing you can be sure:if you continue nursing and pampering your bitterness, you will never discover the blessing the Lord had in mind for you when he sent you the trial in the first place.

            “Cast your burden upon the LORD, and He shall sustain you:He shall never suffer the righteous to be moved” (Psa. 55:22).